The Lagoon is peaceful and seems to have agreed to be the final resting ground for troubled souls.
Recently, it has played host to at least two wondering souls. I first saw the baba who jumped in depite pleas from his fans.
He jumped to his last hooray and swam to safety into the bosom of his maker- whoever or whatever that may be
Last night, I began to see and hear stories about a brilliant young lady who was even just very recently engaged and how she was said to have also jumped into peace.
Me i really will not bother myself with the reasons or justifucations if any of those who suddenly think that the smelly ambience of the Lagoon is befitting as a last vehicle to the beyond
My issue is the new job description of the Lagoon. During its engagement, i remember very clearly that its work was to serve as a beautiful tributory to Lagos.
It was expected to provide a veritable ambience where Lagosians could sit on its shores, make love, sing to each other and generally just find solitude
It was not as violent as the Atlantic Ocean, its big cousin just down the road.
Its sweet mellow surface made us allow it spread inner city with the hope that it would be a partner of progress
But today, it has on its own changed its job description and making itself an undertaker with no licence and giving Ebony Caskets stiff competition
We have summoned it to the panel. We must get to the bottom of this. Why would the Lagoon on its own decide to take on greater responsibility
Its not its fault. It had first started by turning itself over to dirty fishermen who use its wide tentacles as a watery pit laterine.
As if that was not enough, it started providing succor for the underworld down in dirty Makoko and became a sand pit for greedy land grabbers who disvirgin its shores seeking sand to build wobbly brothels and naming them Banana Island and the rest
So it did all that and got away with it. Now it wants to be a watery hearse. Calling and pulling our citizens as it aimes for market leadership
It is no wonder the other day, the hapless drunk went on the bridge choosing to have his brains splattered on the cold tar for LASTMA operatives to walk on.
A brilliant man if you ask me. Id rather have my brains stepped on by errant LASTMA officials who work around with no underwears than have a homosexual fish chew out my withered penis in the Lagos Lagoon
The Lagos Lagoon has a lot of blame cos it is the one not sticking to its JD. It shd be engaged and made to throw back the pitiable souls as they jump in. failure which, we will do the needful- castrate it.
The allure of the Lagoon indeed
Duke of Shomolu
