We started this career getting gold circle condoms for free. If you went to malls, schools, clinics, and any of such places, you would be given the condoms for free.
It was so much that philandering men who forgot the condoms in their pockets would tell their angry wives that they were given at some conference, and the gullible women would smile and walk away.
Today, you get the condoms for about N1,700, depending on which part of the city u plan to carry out your nefarious activities.
On the same street you would get the rough rider or Featherlite variant which are the premium brand for N1,700 at those 24 hour pharmacy shops but if u walked into the nearby filing station you would get the same condom for N700
This is the economics of sex. The demand for this service is inelastic. Just like fuel where Givernment continues to struggle with the debilitating subsidy, there is no subsidy here o.
The openness of society and the ease of access occasioned by this openness have increased the demand for sex to almost malthusian proportions.
Supply now more than ever before exceeds demand, but against all known economic principles, price never comes down.
Daily, more supply is thrown into the market, and even though these reduces quality, demand remains strong, and an equilibrium price remains a mirage.
Now see this. The most expensive sex is the one that comes within the marriage.
The idea is that within that structure, you would be getting access to sex with no obstructions. So, to achieve these, you would spend a little fortune on some wedding ceremony, pay for a house, maintain the house, maintain inlaws, maintain children, and all of that.
Health, clothing, allowances, and expenditure on various ceremonies, birthdays, death of inlaws, etc. all come in the mix
These costs never reduce as they increase as you grow older in the relationship.
The sex starts unabated, and as challenges increase, the cost of these sex grows, and with time, quality reduces on both sides, but costs never come down.
The other types of sex now available in the markets are slightly less expensive simply because if you are clever, you may not have to spend on fundamental things.
But if you are not nimble enough, you would be saddle with the same costs as in marriage and then the added cosst of hotel and transport fare will kill you.
Now, depending on the grading of the woman, hotel rooms could go from 10k to 200k a night.
The small motel nestled in Bariga could give you a room at N10k for your neighbors housemaid and this could go as high as N200k at the Marriot for your MD or the Minsiter of the Federal republic or any top woman who has an over bloated ego.
Then you add refreshments, gifts, and transport which could move from fuelling her car to Keke marwa to a plane ticket, then you could be spending my annual salary on one round of sex.
To cut these costs, some have been known to go to the per hour joints. These also vary from N5,000 to N100,000 depending on location and the grading of the woman.
Some have been known to use uncompleted buildings, dark corridors, cars, and parking spots in malls, all to reduce the cost of location to zero.
But remembr the cost of the lady will go up to soothe her ego that would most likely be bruised by being fucked on the floor near the filling station up the street.
Another area in which we have to also look at is the cost of philandering. Men have been known to buy houses, foreign trips, and flush out huge cash to beg.
Recently, due to the increasing openness and enlightenment, the quest for pleasure has increased phenomenally, so we now begin to see exotic toys and other such things as lubricants entering the equation
A dildo can go from N10k to N50k depending on quality and vendor. They are usually searched and delivered under very coded means.
Due to usage, some female members fall on the very exotic range of lubricants that are on the markets. These are not cheap, and in some cases, the man would have to add this to his cost of sex.
Then, at the high end, we are now seeing body altering surgeries. Buttocks, breasts, skin, and facials. Millions go into these, and men pay in most cases.
As for the men, the sex tea and herbs industry is now a multi-billion Naira industry.
The irony here is that the young men who have the physical ability to play in the premiership usually lack the confidence and resources to buy premium players
The middle age lotahrio who has the resources and confidence lacks the physical ability, so sex enhancing drugs and herbs come to play here
Viagra which used to be very popular, is gradually being replaced with natural substitutes like dates, coconuts, tiger nuts, and other such natural sexual stimulants.
Sex teas are now top sellers promising all sorts of results, and the men indulge.
The economics of sex is such that we must understand that unlike fuel where there is a subsidy, the only subsidy you will get here is abstinence, and where that is not possible, you ration and moderate.
Pace yourelf. Do a budget and keep to it. Grade your partner and tie them to that part of your income that you would have labeled leisure.
Now if you are grading for example and you apportion say N1m per annum for sex and you now go and date say a Toke, you already know that there is a mismatch and sooner than later you may be speaking to the Federal Givernment for a bail out.
But at N1m per annum, you would know that it’s housemaid and secondary sch girsl who are above 18 that are your market range.
Discipline is the watch word. Carve out your financial operational base and stay there. It’s no longer a physical attraction or that she is my town girl. It is now a financial decision.
Lastly, as the incoming President is preparing to name his cabinet and start implementing policies, a subsidy on condoms is very essential if he is going to get the support of the people.
We have been able to track the massive increase in incidences of HIV and other STDs directly to the cost of Condoms.
At N1,700 for a pack of three and a room rate of N5k per hour and uber fare of say N4k depending on where you are coming from and a thank you fee of say N10,000 the univeristy student or bus driver or laborer will take his chances with HIV to reduce cost cos in all of these the condom is the least important factor in this production.
Come see the Play Annonymous Nipples for more insights on the economics of sex
Duke of Shomolu